My Husband And I Part 1

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???????? My Husband And I Part One:

Yesterday, I called my husband to know where he was, he had had asked me to meet him up at one of our usual hangouts, but when I got there, he was no where in sight.

“Where are you son of man?” I had asked playfully, but this man didn’t see the humour in my simple joke.

“What’s that supposed to mean? I’ve told you to stop calling me son of man. You know I prefer to be called Eliza’s son” he thundered.

“It’s okay. I’m sorry son of man, I was only trying to find out where you are” I told him innocently, not knowing I had called him son of man again.

“You know what sweetheart, I’m at the pool side, and I was just making orders for your favourite cow leg pepper soup before you called” he told me, sounding so sweet all of a sudden.

Innocent me didn’t notice the sudden change in his demeanor. How could I have noticed he forgot about the son of man I called him all in a second, when I heard cow leg pepper soup?

I rushed to the pool side to meet the hubby of good life. You needed to see how enchanting my smiles were as I got to the pool side and saw him grinning from ear to ear.

“Why do I feel like this man is up to something? Is he planning to make me pay for calling him since of man? Well whatever it is he does after I get my cow leg pepper soup, I don’t really care” I told myself as I walked to his sides, looking very happy with myself.

We sat down and spent a good amount of time talking while he fiddled with his phone. A look at the mischievous smiles on his face, and I knew he was going to give it to me hard.

But who cares? I was going to have my pepper soup before anything else. It didn’t matter if he decided to pull any stunt after that.

Some minutes later, I saw a waiter approaching us with a tray. I could smell the pepper soup as it approached, and the close the waiter got, the happier the cells in my being became.

The waiter dropped the pepper soup plates on our table and turned around to leave after my dear husband had paid for the order.

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A sound went off on my husband’s phone just as the waiter was about to leave. “Hold on my dear” my husband told the waiter as he put the phone to his ear. Made some indistinct sounds and pressed the red button on his phone.

“I’m sorry to trouble you young lady, but my wife and I are leaving now. Please give this pepper soup to any one you think knows how to take simple instructions” he told her and pulled me up to go.

“Baby, that wasn’t a call just now. It was simply an alarm tone from your phone. Don’t do this. You know how much I love cow leg pepper soup….okay, I promise never to call you….” I was saying but my husband cut in.

“If I say I was called, then I was called. Let’s go” he told me and walked out, pulling me along. I looked back and saw the waiter smiling as she picked a piece of the meat into her mouth. She was even chewing with her eyes closed in delight! A tear dropped, yes, my precious tear dropped!

Hubby told me how he had to do something that would always make me hold my tongue whenever I felt like calling him son of man again. I smiled in my heart, knowing that he was in for a big show.

Later that night, I told my husband I was going to make him cry. I was going to make him experience some of those pleasures I describe in my stories as a payback for what he had done.

This man was smiling happily. Yes, he felt it was a very good punishment, and even reminded me of my proposed punishment as soon as we got into the privacy of our bedroom.

And true to my promise, I started with his earlobe. Then I went down to his chest line. I don’t want to tell you what I did when my hands went below his belt line, but I can tell you he was shaking in spasms when my phone also made it’s own sound.

“The time is 11pm” it announced and I hurriedly got up from the bed. “Where are you going sweetheart?” He asked, stretching pitifully on the bed.

“Oh, I got a call to prepare for the writers get together. And don’t you dare ask me if that was a call. If I say it was a call, then it was a call” I replied matter-of-factly.

“Please my love,I promise to make you have whatever you want after this. I’m already too hot to be l3ft like this. Please forgive me for all the sins I may have committed. I know.my ancestors may have sinned against yours too, please forgive and forget” he spoke quickly when he sensed what was about to happen.

“I told you I was going to do what I describe in my books. And that was what I just did. The only time I described Leonard getting to the promised land in that book was on the wedding night. And this is certainly not our wedding night” I told him as I sauntered out of the room.

I heard him screaming “dey play” repeatedly before I rushed into the guest room. Abeg what’s the meaning of “dey play?” Do you think he’s about to make an order for a home delivery of the cow leg pepper soup?

TO Be Continued